There’s something I call, in my element.
Comfortable, calm, confident.
Cool with every curve and corner I find of myself.
Moving from an intrinsic type of motivation and not extrinsic validation
Moving from, I feel my muscles and my fat and I am okay with that
Moving from, something deep is satisfied when I care for myself in this way
Caring for myself like no one else can because there isn’t a fortune teller that could dictate my mental health
That could tell me I have reached my own threshold, and I should surrender to human sacrifice
Sacrificing that which does me no good for the difficult good I know I must need
That I know I must deserve something I feel for myself
Insulating myself from the misunderstandings of others and accepting myself for every uncommon intricacy I hold
For every contradictory measure I take to incubate my nervous system from the harsh outside conditions
The strength I embody just by merely existing in this world, and in such a fiery language
I believe in the underlying beauty of all things, disconnected and then reconnected when the time is right
Everything must run its course including my sense of attachment to this world, imperfect it may be, wavering it may be, it always returns to me
Like a cold knife in my chest, like a rush of adrenaline, like a drug, like a force I can’t ignore, it is my belonging despite how much I have resisted and excluded myself,
A ribbon reaches out and wraps around my foot, pulling me in. assuring me, you are one. You couldn’t separate yourself enough to lose the rest of us, the best of us take their time to settle down through their sit bones and you have done so. You have found your way to the light. Now embody it.